Added: Sheana Downes - Date: 23.07.2021 21:13 - Views: 11112 - Clicks: 5772
I will start by stating that I am a cisgender heterosexual black woman. I respect all genders and sexual identities; this article is written in my perception. Love, dating, and marriage have been presented to us in such a weird way. We all know that this is trash, especially with more women waiting later to marry and have children.
It has become apparent that women are rethinking the idea of being married young. My parents didn't marry until they were in their early thirties. So, in my book, I'm doing just fine on time. Truth moment: I had the idea that I wanted to be proposed to on graduation day.
All my family would be there, I would have my degree, my ring, and my man. I came down from that cloud real quickly. Marriage was not deed to benefit women, no matter what TI said about Tiny "holding him back". Marriage was deed as an exchange of power and currency between families.
A woman dropped her family name and took on her husband's name. Today, we are challenging everything about marriage. Even down to the name change! I like my name I've had it all my life. All my degrees have my Broke and dating, why TF do I have to change it just because we ed a marriage ?
Seriously, do you know how much time and money it takes to change your name on every document that belongs to you! Not saying I don't want to get married, I definitely do, just not any time soon. None for me. This actually has nothing to do with religious beliefs. That is a situation I can happily live without. Again, I can be broke by my damn self, but I'd rather not be. You are roommates until you are legally married. When you file your taxes, you file as a single person. Until I can claim you on my taxes, there is no way in hell that I will be playing house with any man.
I don't care if we sleepover every night. I still need my own peace and sanity and money separate from you. This ends up becoming an emotional money decision instead of a logical money decision. I hate cooking, and cleaning will only happen when I feel like throwing everything away or for guests.
I would totally rather just hire help.
I also grew up in a home where my mother worked every day and was not domestic. To this day she isn't domestic. Housewives have always been interesting to me because I have never seen that structure in my home. Further, why can't we both provide for each other?
Partners will provide for each other differently, but nonetheless, we are partners. Providing should not only include financial means. So, I do disagree with this outdated way of thinking for some reasons.
BUTI also agree with this statement for other reasons. They also found that only 4. Personally, I agree mainly because men are more likely to have higher salaries than women. These are facts, I didn't make this up! Black women are especially low on the pay scale.
So why pay for an outing when there is a high possibility that my date will be making more money than I do? Lol, I invited my dad to lunch once and he made me pay!?
So, I've adopted this theory and simply will NOT ask for a date. Unpopular opinion: I want a house husband. However, before my partner reaches house husband status, his pay should be close to, or higher than mine. Is a man making less than me a deal-breaker? No, not necessarily. According to DatingNews. Long story short, men care about their income just as much as women. I think society's pressure has also tricked them into thinking they are less than if they are not the breadwinner. I foresee Broke and dating career gaining more and more momentum. To be completely honest, marrying a teacher or tech guy who has more free time or enjoys domestic work is ideal.
I absolutely require a man I am dating to have some source s of income though. It is also a known fact that most divorces are accredited to lack of money or sexual incompatibility. Therefore, I don't feel bad or like a "gold digger" when I expect financial stability from my partner. Do you really think that I would accept a partner that mishandles money!?
You can tell a lot about someone by the way they handle money. It exposes some deep trauma and unearths their true mental state. People who are too frivolous, for instance, can be seen as irresponsible and absent-minded. On the other hand, I do not trust those who ONLY care about money, they cannot be trusted and will sell you out if need be.
Now, I do not and will not ever really refer to myself as being "broke" or "poor". This is all in good fun. There are some dating ideas, or stereotypes, that have been pushed by society. I am here to challenge at least 5 of those dating standards. But keep in mind, I can be broke ALL by myself. Learn about personal finances tips, budgeting, goal setting, financial habits, and all things adulting. Grab the financially innovative workbook! The all-in-one money guide for millennial who need a little help learning how to finance their best lives. Jan 20 Written By Mykail James.
Honestly, do you know how much it costs to break a lease? How about prorated rent, plus 2 months. It is what it is, if I go to work every day so do you. Welcome to the Boujie on a Budget Blog! Us for the Next Master Workshop. Get on the Weekly Newsletter. Follow me on Instagram.
Mykail James The all-in-one money guide for Broke and dating who need a little help learning how to finance their best lives.Broke and dating
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Dating and Money: I Can Be Broke All By Myself